~lilymonhai

I know I haven't been on a lot... but I'll try starting now.. I am thinking of doing RL commissions looking at how the foreign exchanges are going ==;; and let me tell you.. it aint pretty in my home.. so I'm thinking that I can *hopefully* sell some art to get some money to support my parents? owo;; any amount counts..
but this is not offical yet... i need to figure out this paypal policy and such, and can any one give me some advice? owo;; -totally new into this- @@
greatly appreciated...

as for me... I'm having bit of time drawing since I think.. i have too high expectations and can't really overcome it ;w;
but... i am improving in traditional art.. -surprise? owo- but de-proving in CG and stuff... i will probably upload new art work soon..
and i got a new account on da.. somewhere x'D have fun searching for it..
it contains some of my commish arts =3

futhermore...
is it me.. or DA's message center is really messed up? owo it wont let me clear any of my messages ;w;'' help?

not like anyone's gonna care... but...
is it always i rant on my journals? X.x;

the midterm yesterday was not hard but little time to finish. *curses whoever made up the midterm* i practically cant move my arm after finishing it. And i realized I got one question wrong, which is 2 marks off

then the next midterm is psychology, which is worse... since all the teacher talked about was about the brain and it's functions... dude i did not purposly not take biology in high school! @.@ i can't not take it memorizing each parts (frontal lobe...hypa-something) their functions.. their diseases and what drugs to take to cure it or who discovers bleh bleh blah @@;;;

my co-op on the other hand... is going extremely unwell.... which makes me to start to wonder if i'll get a job next term @@;;; but..... i am planning to see my advisor... argh

I am also beginning to doubt if taking math is what i want. but then, there's nothing else i would actually want to take, other than art. But i feel like such a dumbass in there due to ppl i met are super smart... which makes me beginning to feel i chose the wrong major/university.

on the other hand... i am beginning to feel more and more like failure since i have not been able to compelete any project i set out to do..... like my manga, my art, my site, the only thing i completed was finish playing VP: lenneth...... which is not relavent since the feeling of accomplish can only be enjoyed when the end flashes and it is gone again...

speaking of manga, i am hoping that i would acutally getting on my lazy ass and start do something about it... meanwhile, I am talking with a friend of friend of mine and we want to start something together... hopefully that won't be one of my failure...

lately..... i have dreamt alot about going back to magee and play in the band. I wonder what that suggest to me? since everytime i wake up i feel sad. Maybe i want to get back to be able to play in the band due to i haven't really touched my flute or is it something else? I also have constant dreams of seeing friends in high school... and everytime i woke up i have the feeling i lost something important.... which makes me want to go back to msn or such and talk with others, friends i have met before...

also, i keep having the urge to draw characters i created before and want to look for things i enjoyed doing in the past and try to pick up them again. maybe i am escaping reality but hopefully i am not in depression.

i'm so tired T_T;;; this week i havent been able to get/snatch the comp away from my dad till now T.T;;; this week sux, and i don't feel like commenting on artworks, dont worry i looked at them >.>;;;

anyways, good news this week is that i got my gamecube! any games people wanna recommend?

ummm ya gaia! after seeing around 10 pics for gaia in a week, i decided it's time to check out gaia again...the prob is that after been away for 8 monthes i am totally clueless and i need help T.T;;; can anyone tell me the prices for last year's donation items and this years? or where to find an estimate T.T;;;

I totally remenber the reason for leaving gaia =.=''' i only had 1k left....anyways, I am planning to do commissions on gaia again, but I am always not really good with the pricing, anyone wanna estimate how much my art sell for: CG, pencil and pen? XP;;;

also i have been thinking of doing real commissions for a long time, I want to know if people want to buy my art and how much they'll pay for it, in US or Canadian

thank you much for reading this! *goes to work*

yay happy chinese new year to everyone! i am too lazy to make up a picture so i'll say it in a journal! <3 <3 <3

to make this journal short, one more thing, i won't be on as much till feb 20th-ish because my father is home for chinese new year and we have to fight over the computer! XD;;; so anyways! *happy and hyper* @.@ i'll try to be on half hour per day <3

Just want to pop on and say happy new year to everyone And to show I'm not dead lolz . Hope you all have a good holiday ^^ I did, tho coming back to school was like hell *.*;;

Also, I realized I haven't been up to date with all the comments and favs ; *even though I recieve so few* I have been too lazy to reply *hit self* I do read them and enjoy reading them over and over again ^^ ;;; I will try to reply more often from now on ;; *hopefully*

ANother thing! I know this is a bit late, but I got a domain : [link]
I hope people will try to visit it! *it would make me very happy* ^0^ It still has some bugs here and there with some place need update but I try to keep it updated every month ;

I think that's all I wanna say O.o? Comments are welcome *tho I doubt anyone will comment* and um hopefully I can finish the current picture I'm working on in 1 month lolz